How To Save A Marriage The Secret Principles Revealed!

Are you in the mists of a difficult and painful marriage crisis? Are you frustrated and heartbroken over your partner's rejection? Has your partner dropped this emotional nuclear bomb on you; "I love you, but I'm not in love with you anymore?" Or, worse; Im having an affair? Have you asked your partner to attend counseling only to be rebuked? Are fraught with anxiety and completely panic stricken because you dont know what to say or do to win your partner back?

If youre like most, you wake up one day to discover that your marriage is shattered. Most of the passion and romance has all but disappeared, and you feel more like roommates than lovers. Even though the crisis seemed to surface suddenly, in most cases it does not. A marriage crisis usually builds slowly over time with one person being blindsided by the event and the other claiming that theyve tried to make the marriage work, but to no avail!

When faced with the prospects of divorce most people turn to marriage counseling, however, ninety percent of the time their partner refuses to participate. Subsequently, the majority of people turn to the mainstream approach of improving communication skills, or they attempt to apply a full court romantic love press. Well, Im about to show you why both of those ideas are not only fundamentally amiss, but they will also send your marriage over the cliff faster that you can bat your eyelashes!

Let me ask you a question; when you and your partner first met did you have problems communicating? Of course you didnt! So, why would you believe that communication is the core issue? You see, a lack of communication is just the symptom of larger underlying issues. And, if you ignore whats underneath and focus on superficial surface behavior, you may as well sign the marriage settlement agreement because thats where your marriage is headed anyway! At the end of the day, people dont want to communicate with someone that is needy, smothering, argumentative, critical or mistrusting!

If your partner has withdrawn and is proposing divorce, he doesnt want to be close to you. And, he certainly doesnt want to be romantic-either! So, applying the full court love press sends the wrong message - a completely disastrous one at that. In essence, youre telling your partner that you want him to be close, and that you dont really care what he wants. This also sends a message to your partner that you really dont understand how he feels!

You see, if you want to get your husband back youve got to get him to make that decision! And, that requires two things:

1. Taking ownership of your negative contributions to the relationship without attacking your partner. The best way to accomplish that is by drafting a statement of agreement.
2. You must be willing to change your behavior and harness the power of attraction
After youve drafted a statement of agreement, present it to your husband. Tell your husband that you agree, and that you understand hes been asking you for a change, and you havent given it to him. Dont talk about what hes done wrong. If you talk about where hes wrong hell become more wrong, and if you talk about where hes right hell immediately become less wrong. You see, most people dont know that if you agree and sound sincere to the other person while refraining from defending yourself they will actually defend you! They will not only defend you, but in many cases will actually reverse their position. Dont be afraid to address your negative contributions to the relationship such as mistrust, control, criticism or neediness. When speaking to your partner, your demeanor should be one of confidence and humility. And at all costs, do not show desperation and do not fall to pieces. Not convinced? Give it a try for the next two weeks without telling your mate anything about what youre doing. You may be pleasantly surprised at the results!

Regards,

David Roppo
The Relationship Rehab Coach

By:
vcoach

For more information on how to save your marriage and how to draft a statement of agreement subscribe to my Free e-guide The Secret Principles to Saving a Relationship below. how to save a relationshiphow to save a marriage save a relationship